Schlockmania’s Official SAW Parody Short Script (Free PDF Download!)

This is the first post of Schlockmania’s 2nd year.  To commemorate this special occasion, Your Humble Reviewer wanted to do something interesting and different for the site’s readers.  With that in mind, Schlockmania would like to present its first ever short screenplay – a little collection of barbed humor and Monty Python-style comedic gore entitled Stop The Deathtrap, I Want To Get Off!

The inspiration for this script came from the Saw series.  Despite being one of the most popular – and controversial – franchises in the history of the horror genre, it’s never really done much for Your Humble Reviewer…  and after suffering through last year’s dreadful seventh (!) entry in the series, he wanted to write a response to these films and his many problems with them.  That he said, he didn’t want to write the usual critical essay and fill the crowded blogosphere with yet another rant.

Instead, it seemed more interesting to respond with humor and address all the things that he wished would happen in one of the ever-more-repetitive Saw sequels.  Thus, this short screenplay was born.  You can read it online if you have Adobe Acrobat incorporated into your browser – or you can download it directly from the site in PDF form by right-clicking on the following link:

STOP THE DEATHTRAP, I WANT TO GET OFF!

Your Humble Reviewer hopes that you read it – and if you are kind enough to do so, he sincerely hopes you find a fun experience.  Even if you disagree with its satirical aims, perhaps it might get you thinking about what you do or don’t love about the Saw series – and as always, your comments would be most welcome.

Happy reading and don’t let the bad horror sequels get you down…

(Obligatory Legal Notice: the script mentioned above has been registered with the Writer’s Guild Of America and this is noted on its title page.  Anyone is welcomed to read it and distribute it to whoever they like – but it must always be credited to its author.)

2 Replies to “Schlockmania’s Official SAW Parody Short Script (Free PDF Download!)”

  1. Love it! Particularly the literal “breaking the 4th wall” (which is my all-time, most-hated thing about post-postmodern horror) My favourite, though, is when he reattaches his arms. Gold!

  2. I now know why the caged film critic sings! 😉

    Laughed out loud all the way through, and you hit the nail on the head (or in the head as it were) about the impossible to conquer traps that only give the semblance of a choice when there’s really no choice or chance of escape at all!

    I liked the first SAW, which I didn’t see until it hit video on none other than Valentine’s Day, so my husband and I started a “bloody valentine” tradition to watch the next SAW each year… I think we stopped around SAW 5 because the series had devolved into torture porn. What I liked about the first SAW was that it used the suggestion of torture porn to lure you into a film that turned out to have less gore and more on suspense. That balance shifted over the series, leaving behind all suspense for JUST gore. I can only imagine what 6 & 7 were like, but 7 would’ve been wise to include a produced version of this script as it’s finale!

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